Some of the most negative thinking comes to mind as regret or worry. Regrets are negative thoughts about the past, while worries are negative thoughts about the future. Neither of them has any validity in the present, but they are recurring thoughts that unnecessarily interfere with our wellbeing.
The best way to deal with such negative thinking is to at first realize that it’s just wasted time. Leo used to always ask people: “Do you worry a lot?” With the almost-always affirmative reply, he’d say:
“If you worry a lot, then you’re a professional at doing nothing. You have to act to do something about it.”
Those strong words were directed at me when I first met Leo, because I was under a cloud of worry-tivity – my world was full of worry. I worried about everyone else, too, because I had become an expert at worrying. I spent my childhood learning all about the ins and outs of worrying from my mother who was an expert at worrying about everything and everybody. That’s even worse than worrying about one’s own problems, because there’s really nothing anyone can do about someone else’s problems.
I gladly learned that worrying is simply fear of the future. While we can and should act to make our future the reality that we desire, we still have to go through all the positive steps that will lead to that future. Our lives are a work in progress, so we need to understand that every constructive action we take will lead us in a positive direction toward our goals. And we must be prepared to ad lib and make changes as external events act upon us.
Worrying takes us nowhere, but it causes a distraction in our normal thought processes and takes us into the negative realm. Once we’re submersed in negative thinking patterns (i.e. the go-nowhere good-for-nothing worrying), we also attract negative energy/spirits that fuel the process and feed off of the negative energy that we’ve created.
When I was learning to refuse negativity, I learned to counteract the act of worrying, that had forced me into the corner of doing nothing about my problems. While I was worrying, I wasn’t formulating a plan of how to solve my problems; I was just adding to them. While I was a ‘worry-wart’ I was unable to disassociate myself from the future negativity that I was creating in my mind. In other words, I was heading straight into negative territory every time I worried.
In addition to attracting negative energy/spirits when we worry a lot, there are greater spiritual implications. Mental and emotional negativity converge at the throat chakra and can allow damage to the spiritual opening, causing additional physical side effects such as thyroid malfunction. When I started to work with my spirit and learned to refuse the negativity that invaded my thoughts every time I thought about my future, I was able to direct myself in a positive direction. Not only had I been creating undue mental stress, but I was unable to enjoy the luxury of physical relaxation. When I let go of my worrying, I was able to allow my body to relax and heal. As I learned to relax, refuse negative thoughts and to take action to direct my own future, I let go of my expertise at worrying and all its negative side effects.
As I worked with my spirit and emerged from my worrying pastime, I saw so much more potential in my life than as a survivor of spousal abuse. In a time of high unemployment while I was training to work as Leo’s assistant, I found interim work as the manager of a portrait studio (350 applicants) and renewed my interest in coaxing babies to break out their smiles (toothless or not!) Once I started to love myself, believe in myself and care for myself both physically and spiritually, I abandoned my expertise at worrying and became the director of my future.
Whether we believe in fate or determinism, it seems true that everything happens for a reason so that we can learn and benefit from both the positives and the negatives in life. As long as we direct ourselves in the best ways possible, it does us no good to worry about events that are beyond our control. For instance, while we await the ‘end date’ of the Mayan calendar on December 21, 2012, we can choose to view it simply as the end of a calendar, as the date of a possible global catastrophe or as the beginning of an enlightened era in human history. From the quantum perspective of the Many Worlds Theory, every action we take could manifest countless alternative outcomes in other parallel universes, but we get only one.
As we gain more insight about our place in the multiverse, we ought to face our future with confidence and optimism for the best possible outcome, so that we can allow ourselves to prosper at all levels of existence.
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